A Rose is a Rose by any other name

Website Users 24;
Going Right; Got linked to someone’s blog; they called me a ‘bright idea’. Yay.
Going Wrong; Full site STILL wasn’t launched so anyone who clicked through saw a crappy WordPress pilot.
Comment; Quickly adjusted page header to say ‘Full Site coming soon, get 300 credits by signing up now.’ No-one signed up.

Names are important. #Shakespeare #Fail.

My boyfriend agrees with Shakespeare though – he just doesn’t care that spaghetti Bolognese, is different to Chili con Carne. They’re both tomato-y meat sauce.

It’s not that I don’t like the additional spice and kidney beans, it’s just not what I ordered.

You see, in a previous life I was an analyst by trade. A fairly good one. Not an expert exactly, but someone whom people who know nothing about excel or finance would call an expert. I live in fear that some Berkeley expert, somewhere, will denounce me very soon.

What I am definitely not, is a lawyer, a marketer, a copywriter,  a web designer, an accountant…

Well as you can imagine, the list of what I am not goes on. I am not a web security expert either. So when someone said to me the other day – typically just days before launch:

‘As you know, unless you’re registered with the data controllers’ commissioner, you can’t accept peoples’ private information on your website.’

‘But surely if they are putting it on the web for all and sundry it’s not exactly private.’ I said. ‘In fact it’s their choice. All I am asking for is a User name and an email. The credit card stuff is taken care of by PayPal until we get the merchant account set up with the bank.’

‘Doesn’t matter. Data protection and all that.’

The internet was built with the express purpose to share all information. But people still want it to be private. We are a population who want it all. Simplicity with complexity. The cake but not the weight. The virginal wife, and the bedroom whore. Total privacy, but with the ability to peep over the top of the cubicle.

It cost me 35 quid to register with the data controller commissioner, yet another start-up expense to add to the lengthy list which has so far cost me £20,000. Of course it’s not in the same league as paying 2000 quid to lawyers who add vital clause 1.1.1 to my terms and conditions but which consists of less characters than a tweet.

P.S. No ringing endorsement of PayPal, by the way.

I hate them as I hate anyone who pretends that the best way to provide customer support is to hide their phone number several layers deep on their website.

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